Tag Archive for 'George W. Bush'

Finally, An Ex-President Who Can Keep Silent!

Published on March 20, 2009 in Just Having Fun!. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , , .

 

            There is something to be said about maintaining a certain dignity for the office of the President of the United States.  After all, this is the people’s office and we need men who have respect for the tradition that comes with attaining the trust of the largest number of people.

 

            It has been a while since we have had an Ex-President who did not feel it was his job to offer his opinion on the holder of the office.  Bill Clinton, a man without a mission, could not keep quiet about the man before him or the man after him.  How sad to be at the highest office in the land and still be so small that you cannot show dignity.

 

            Jimmy Carter, without argument the worst President we have ever had, could not help but offer his advice for the occupants of the office.  Perhaps we should learn from the peanut farmer turned nuclear scientist that once you have so miserably failed at a task you should not think your opinions matters.

 

            Now, George W. Bush has taken a pass at the chance to speak about the situation Obama finds himself in.  In fact, Bush’s words were, “he deserves my silence.”  Jimmy and Bill could learn from this.  When you did nothing to deal with Iran, Jimmy, and you proved yourself incapable of dealing with terrorists, Bill, you really would serve yourself and your country well to practice the art of silence.

 

            George W. Bush kept us safe for seven years.  You might consider him a terrible President, I do not, but he did keep us safe. 

 

            And now, instead of blasting those after him he is taking the decent man’s route and refusing to talk publicly about what a terrible job the current occupant is doing.

 

            Oh, and for my friends out there who do not think we should criticize, please consider this my call for you to pray for the current occupant of the Oval Office, the Lord knows we need God to intervene and protect him and help him to act in our best interests which seem to be against his normal positions.  This will in turn will protect us.

The Preservative Value of Plastic: Cher Lives!

Published on February 6, 2009 in Just Having Fun!. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

 

            I have to say that I love George W. Bush, I know that is not popular, but then what do I care?  I have thought that Bush’s Presidency was successful with some serious failures.

 

            Now, I have to rethink my opinion.  If I had known how close Bush came to killing Cher and yet failed I would never have felt good about his Presidency.  So close, but this in not hand grenades. 

 

            Cher lives, thus Bush failed.

 

            The real question is, and you will have to excuse me for cussing but this moment demands it, why in the hell is it that liberals cannot win graciously.  They have the Senate, the House, and the Presidency and still they want to whine about George W. Bush.

 

            Grow up and shut up.  Get in line right behind the proverbial Bruce Springsteen who only manages to sound stupid when he is talking.  Otherwise he seems like a nice, intelligent rock star.  Mr. Springsteen, do us all a favor and go behind that huge security gate on your properties and use that gate to our advantage—shut up and sing, then we can turn to another station, problem solved.

 

            Of course, part of the problem is that they are deliberately working hard to make matters worse than they are so that expectations will be low and thus success not expected.

 

            Even Forrest Gump could succeed in the world Obama wants us to believe he inherited from Bush.  These arguments might be nice if we would only forget that it is Congress that has spending power.  And then we have to remember who is in control of Congress—oh, yeah, the Democrats, the global warming creating and fighting, abortion-providing taxers of everything good and decent in our world.

 

            Oh, I know, let us live in the hope that was promised.  Let us live in a world where government spending on government programs will help the rest of us.

 

            What we need is a good five year plan, just like our father Joseph Stalin was so fond of.  Well, there probably is some hope for that.

 

            Cher, do not give up.  A couple of more surgeries and you might even be preborn—then you have nothing to fear from your crowd of heroes and baby killers.

San Francisco, Enough Said

Published on October 18, 2008 in The Bigger Picture. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

            For the past couple of months we keep hearing that San Francisco voters are going to be given the chance to name a waste treatment plant after George W. Bush.  They seem to think it is funny to make fun of sitting Presidents.  Of course, for a land of tolerance, at least tolerance of liberal ideas, they do not seem so tolerant to me.

 

            First of all, I think the White House should release a statement thanking San Francisco for considering naming this facility after President Bush.  This is what I think the statement should say:  “President Bush wishes to offer his sincere thanks to the people of San Francisco for naming a waste treatment plant after him.  He personally considers it an honor to finally be recognized in this manner.  After all, for the past eight years, the President has taken all of San Francisco’s crap and worked to clean it up.  Now he is getting the recognition for his work.”

 

            That said, I think there is something to be said for respect.  We showed respect for Jimmy Carter.  I am not sure why we showed respect, but we did.  We showed respect for Bill Clinton; even though he made sure we had to get our children out of the room for the news.  Even my five year son knew what the word is is.

 

            Maybe it is time to denounce San Francisco.  These nuts who insist on forcing their beliefs on the rest of the country need to stop talking.  The mistake they are making is to believe that they are important.  They must be important; after all, they keep telling us they know what is best.

 

            San Francisco should turn their attention on themselves.  They should spew their filth across their city instead of out of it and see if really smells as good as they seem to think it does.

 

            Those who live on an active, large fault should watch themselves.  The ground ahs been known to open up and swallow the filth of this planet—that might just solve global warming for us.

Jimma Carter, We Hardly Knew Ye!

Published on October 11, 2008 in The Bigger Picture. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , .

            I can remember when I would make stupid statements like, “Jimmy Carter may be the worst President we have ever had, but he is a great former President.”  How stupid was I?  Not on the former part of the statement, but on the later part of the statement.

 

            Jimmy Carter was a lousy Governor, made to look better by his complete ineptness as President.  What a joke he proved to be!  Interest rates out of control, inflation out of control, gas crisis that is not even matched today, and who can forget the Iranian Hostage Crisis.  God protect the country that finds an incompetent like Jimmy Carter in charge of it ever again.

 

            Give me George W. Bush any day.  Give me Herbert Hoover for that matter.  Who remembers Jimma’s conservation idea of turning up the thermostat in the summer and down in the winter?  Thanks for leading the way, Jimma.  That is about as good as inflating our tires on the road to energy indepence.

 

            For a long time Jimmy served us well as former President.  At least he was not destroying our country with his lack of wisdom and childish approach to life and politics.

 

            I am sure some Carterophiles are upset by now.  Well, for too long we have apologized for Reagan and Bush—it is your turn to apologize.  The most amazing thing is that we survived Carter’s Presidency at all.

 

            I could forgive Jimmy all of this if he would just shut up!  Why would he believe we want to hear what he has to say about politics?  Maybe it would be good if America’s most failed President just went back to peanut farming in Plains.  He could ride his bike to the store and let us finally forget the legacy of disgrace he left us.

 

            That would be asking too much, since Jimmy is busy winning Noble Peace Prizes and glorifying Hezbollah, the terrorist organization.  Jimmy’s lack of wisdom was best displayed when he accepted the Noble Peace Prize—even the organizers admitted they were only giving it to Jimmy as a slap in George W. Bush’s face.  Well done, Jimmy!  Have a peanut on me!

 

            Now, every time I turn around Jimmy Carter is declaring that Bush’s policies are a failure, or Bush does not know what he is doing.  I would submit that being complete incompetent does not make you a valid judge of incompetence.  Incompetence by its very definition is not something one incompetent recognizes in another incompetent.  While Jimmy Carter does not have a clue about anything to do with reality and government, that does not make him a valid critic of anyone else.  This is one area where experience is not the best teacher.  

 

            In the words of the singer Larry Norman, “Carter told the Iranians if you don’t let our hostages go, next time I am going to crash the helicopters even closer.”

 

            The interesting thing is that the Welcome Center for Plains, Georgia has a little Carter Corner that shows photos from Jimma’s Presidency.  Two things struck me, one there is not photo of Jimmy in a dunces cap.  The other thing is there is a caption on the last photo that states, “Jimmy Carter negotiating the release of the American hostages.” 

 

            Plains might want to rewrite their history and play to their favorite son.  The rest of us would do well to stop letting people like Jimmy Carter make up history and change their own story for their own gain.

 

            You might be a great Sunday School teacher, but you also showed us that being smart or a nice guy does not qualify you for President of the United States.